No matter how you slice it, once you are in a committed relationship, whatever happens to one person affects both of you. Even if you keep your financial lives somewhat separate,Couple let’s face it, there is a joint impact. Some unexpected events from this week got me to thinking about this very concept even more deeply.

As most regular readers know, I own my own company, The Paula G. Company and am building my business while still working a full time job (ala being my own venture capitalist). Well, make that WAS working a full time job. The whims of Corporate America and creative departmental reorganization efforts threw me into the “past tense” when it comes to the word employee. While I am convinced it is a blessing in disguise, that doesn’t make the impact any less. It also doesn’t lessen the impact on our household since I am the primary breadwinner and my partner is on the hunt for new opportunities. I’ll be writing a short series on my whole experience as I wander through it so stay tuned for that, but for now, let’s focus on the sleeping with money side of it.

Are you prepared for whatever might befall either you or your partner? How aware are you of each other’s or your joint finances? Do each of you know what it costs to run your household each month? Do you know what expenses are fixed, variable, or temporarily foregoable? (If not, check out the expense tracker.) What does your emergency fund look like? What emotional baggage or hidden beliefs are you carrying around with respect to your partner’s ability to earn income?

Believe me when something unexpected like a medical emergency, major home repair/relocation, or in this case job loss happens, the time is ripe for emotions and tempers to flare and for the very crux of your relationship to take a beating. Fortunately, when my partner lost her job a few years ago we did it all the “wrong way” in terms of how to best treat one another on an emotional level so we have a whole new perspective on what is really important. Beating yourself or each other up is no way to approach such a situation.

So, how do you navigate uncharted waters? I have never lost a job before and certainly have never been in a position where I have a myriad of options and decisions regarding my business and my desire (or lack thereof) to work for someone else full time. Not to mention life’s expenses and a need for money and continued desire to build wealth keeps rollin’ on.

Since I’m only 2 days into this whole process having received the news on Tuesday (my second day back from vacation I might add), I don’t have any answers or even personal lessons learned to share yet other than my solid foundation as a coach. That voice sees every situation as an opportunity and something that I had a hand in directly creating. It is a VERY empowering place to come from even though it doesn’t negate the rollercoaster of a full range of emotions.

How about you? Have you had a similar experience? How did you handle it individually and as a couple? If you haven’t had this experience, are you prepared in case you do? (Trust me, the news will surprise you even in the best of circumstances.)

I’d love to hear what you have to say. Most importantly take to hear the very truth that what happens to one person in a couple happens to the couple as a unit. And always….people and relationships come first, then worry about the logistical details.