Queercents

Homebirthing is popular these days, but for lesbian and transgendered couples who are likely to be less financially solvent and less likely to have great family medical insurance, this is an even greater trend. Add to the mix the fact that midwives are much more used to serving same-sex couples than the staff at a hospital might be.

At-home birth with a midwife not only lowers the chances of some complications during birth, a lower risk of post-birth infection, and has a lower cesarian section delivery rate, there is another great reason to birth at home: It’s cheaper. Much cheaper. In fact, sometimes a third of the cost of hospital birth and allopathic care. Read the rest of this entry »

Never buy perfume or cologne again.

I love to teach people how to enjoy cosmetics without contributing to the destruction of the planet. I also love to convince people why they should stop putting chemical-filled cosmetics and toiletries on thier skin. Unfortunately, I do have one habit which I haven’t kicked. Perfume.

I love smells, the associations with smells. Part of the “high-femme drag” of my particular performance of gender includes “wafting” in and our of rooms and smelling myself when I toss arm in the heat of conversation. But good perfume, aside from being unhealthy and hated by some sensitive noses, is the most expensive cosmetic. Read the rest of this entry »

Wanting to bulk up your wardrobe or change your style? Consider changing your ways over to some very frugal fashion options. Sure, Old Navy is affordable, but their labor practices suck and you will wind up looking like everyone else walking the street. Yawn.

Thrifting:

Some rich people have “personal shoppers.” I have a “Personal Thrift Shopper.” I trade my Life Coaching services with Jen so that she will spend some of her weekly thrift and consignment shopping time looking for things I would like. Quite frankly, as much as I love shopping, I do not believe in buying new clothing when there are so many great items that have been slightly worn. I do not want to contribute to wasteful mass-production, or unfair labor. I also have eclectic and expensive tastes which I could not otherwise afford. There is the Goodwill, Theater Thrift Stores (old theater clothing), and trendy stores which mix the old and the new. Read the rest of this entry »

Oh, how this wannabe housewife loves to write lists. This week in Femme Economics, I have another list of helpful hints that will save your purse and the environment and still keep you and the “Shirt” you love looking good!

I just spent fifty dollars on dry cleaning. Fortunately, I have figured out how to do this only once a year.

1. Re-wear. If an item is not food-stained or particularly stinky, surprise- you don’t have to wash it! You can chalk this up to my years as a hippy feminist, but it will save money on water, detergent and will make your clothes last so much longer! Repetitive washing and drying strips items of their fibers, making them easier to rip and tear. You will just be doing less laundry this way. Lint-roll it and… Read the rest of this entry »

Welcome to our new Queercents series, Femme Economics. This series is geared toward anyone who identifies as feminine, male, female and otherwise, or who wants to live the more traditionally feminine gender roles in a socially conscious way. Often, these posts will apply to all different gender identities.

Day Spa Do’s and Don’ts:

1. Do ask if you can sign up on your favorite spas’ mailing lists. You will most certainly receive emails for percentages off services. And many spas will send you a card for something free on your birthday.

2. Do make friends with your massage therapist/esthetician. Loyalty, good tipping and friendliness can get you free add-on services, can help you get squeezed in at the last minute. Read the rest of this entry »

It’s hard to believe nobody has yet written about the “Sugar” dynamic on our Queercents “Sleeping with Money” column. It’s dirty work, but somebody has to do it. Fortunately, I’m a very dirty girl.

If you follow QC, you may know that I had a stint as a stripper. You may not know that I have also been a professional dominatrix. These items make me predisposed to both knowing about “Sugar daddies/mamas” as a sexual fetish and just plain having more money than my partners and therefore being forced into this position on a more mundane level.

When in the sex work industry, I had more money than I make now focusing on my writing, music and Life Coaching practice. My clients were mostly straight white wealthy men, but my dates in personal life were artistic lesbians and transgendered men: usually poets. Mostly in between real jobs! Read the rest of this entry »

I learned about siesta first as a child visiting Mexico and then as an adult from pure necessity. I used to be a preschool teacher from 8-1 every day. That half-day would feel like I had been running ragged for twelve hours. At exactly 2:30 I would get home and not be able to stay awake to work on my creative projects. I did that in the evening, after napping.

At about this time of year, when it finally gets hot in the Northwest, I start needing a daily nap. I was shaking my fist recently at some radio news as some financial people interviewed poo-pooed the idea of a siesta benefiting corporate America. It’s cut-throat survival of the fittest here and fit seems to mean exhausted and jacked-up on caffeine. Mediterranean climates, and our neighbors to the south have historically known a different kind of work day.

The numbers are there as the Siesta Awareness website notes:

“A short 10-20 minute nap in the middle of a working day can increase productivity by over 30% and alertness by 100% as well as improve memory and concentration, according to NASA.” Read the rest of this entry »

I became a Life Coach only after having my own business as a personal organizing coach, a job I still occasionally do. I love to go through and get rid of other people’s junk. Because I am usually also life-coaching for these clients, however, I try to give them skills and even rules to avoid the re-building of the City of Junk. When I’m doing the organizing, I am painfully aware of the hundreds of dollars worth of things we wind up throwing out or giving away and the hoarding tendencies and careless spending habits of my clients. Here are some tricks to save money, save space and save your sanity:

1. Try putting yourself on a thrift-store junk/e-bay splurge/mall-spree/garage sale drive-by Buyer’s Diet for three months. Give yourself a hug when you want to buy something. Strangely, once you see that you can live without accumulating junk and giving in to every whim, you will begin to challenge yourself to see what other non-necessities you can do without. Read the rest of this entry »

My car was broken into on a recent Sunday in broad daylight. My much-loved Martin guitar was stolen along with my purse (sans wallet, which was thankfully with me). To read the details of the story and it’s aftermath, visit my personal blog. To study up on what to do if this financial hardship befalls you, read on.

1. Call the police. Don’t touch it. Let the report be taken exactly how you found the scene. If glass has spilled out onto a street, driveway or parking lots, get some help in sweeping up just the glass that could effect living creatures or another car.

2. If glass is broken into the car, don’t bother trying to sweep it out. I cut myself twice through gloves trying to do this then realized the mobile glass installer had a shop-vac and that it was part of his job. Read the rest of this entry »

In this week’s Sleeping With Money I let you in on some of the foibles of my past. Oh dear, how we queers love serial monogamy! And so many of us also want marriage equality so badly that when we fall for someone, we start thinking big. Three years ago, I was quite madly in love with and then was to be wed to a genius drummer girl. We were together only three months when we announced our engagement. Our break-up could be contributed to youth, stupidity, and many of the things in my previous Sleeping With Money post; but also to the reason I warned against in my last post: her depression and my I having an emotional affair with someone else. She couldn’t keep a job. I hated mine. But we had a wedding to plan! And then, a wedding to cancel.

The following is exactly how I cancelled my wedding, step by step and tried to get some our money back.

The Venues: This is why you probably would have paid a deposit. Read the rest of this entry »