Does Women’s Trusting Culture Help Identity Thieves?
What brought this train of thought on?
Well, I had read an article on Identity Theft earlier in the day where along with the fact that such theft is committed overwhelmingly (more than 50%) by someone the victim knows, (family member, friend, or coworker), among other things it stated a victim of identity theft was 26% more likely to be female.
Later on at work (I drive a Bus hauling around college students working in the Disney College Program so I generally see the same kids day to day) and I happened to notice something that on reflection is a frequent habit among the ladies but rare among the men.
What do they do? Well, in order to ride the transportation system you have to show your Housing ID.
No less than 6 times on Saturday night a lady had to ask her lady friend for her wallet so she could get her ID… seems it is a rather common practice for the lady with the big purse to end up as the carryall for small clutch purses or wallets. (God forbid, you put anything in a pocket… it’s treated worse than panty-lines)
Once in a while same can be said for the boyfriend out with girlfriend and she has his wallet in her purse. And once in a VERY great while one man will have the others wallet in his pocket.
The thing that struck me is the ladies tend to be very trusting of others. (Age thing maybe? They’re almost all in the 18-25 category.)
Personally, I couldn’t see myself letting someone else carry my wallet… I see most men having a fit even if their Mothers picked them up let alone anyone else.
I really wonder if this trustfulness to let another woman carry their wallets has any relation to the higher incidence of Identity Theft for women. Do any of you let others carry your purses/wallets?
Do you think the risk of identity theft is too small even though more than half if it is caused by someone the victim knows?
Photo credit: stock.xchng.
Roland: “Personally, I couldn’t see myself letting someone else carry my wallet…” — but that’s because you carry a manbag, right?
It makes sense that a high percentage of identity theft is committed by someone the victim knows. Anyone remember what Kathy Griffin revealed when she got divorced:
I carry my own purse… although Jeanine and I have both been known to abandon our purses and toss our wallets in the diaper bag lately. How many bags can one carry with a 16 lb baby in tow?
I’m not trusting. The only person who lets me carry his wallet is BF 😛 Because I have a purse and he sometimes doesn’t have pockets.
Other than that, I don’t let others touch my wallet or go near my money. Just paranoia I guess
Roland, this is a legit question and I think you mean well. But it honestly comes off as being more than just a little bit sexist.
A) Women are not all naively trusting, as you imply. Gender is a learned behavior, not an innate quality. Yes, trust, cooperation, compassion, and relationship-building have traditionally been considered “feminine” values, and women are typically socialized to embody these traits. But there is nothing inherent to women’s biological nature that causes them to be trusting.
B) While it may be true that women in the 18-25 age set seem to be concerned with their appearance, the same can be said about men in that age group. I know you were trying to make a joke with the reference to panty lines, but that joke was in really poor taste. You seem to imply that women have nothing between their ears except for shallow thoughts about their looks. They’re so shallow, in fact, that they don’t even pay attention to their wallets (which happen to be a phallic symbol if you buy into the mythology that the man is the breadwinner and woman only need jobs because they want more “hat money” to spend on frivolous things like new clothes).
The fact is, women are more likely than men to be the victims of crime, period. We live in a patriarchal culture that devalues women. Women are victimized on a daily basis and we are unfortunately raised to believe that we will inevitably be the victim of rape, incest, or domestic violence. What’s a little identity theft when 1 in 2 women is the victim of sexual violence?
Like I said, I don’t think you meant to come off as sexist. I do think you have a legit question. I just think the way that it was phrased came off in a pretty patronizing tone.
Nina: Yes I carry a “manbag”…but the wallet doesn’t go in it.
Serena: I’m sorry you may have thought the post sexist or patronizing…it certainly wasn’t meant to be.
I hardly think all women are naively trusting…I was just commenting on observed behavior and wondering if it had any correlation to women’s higher incidence of being subject to identity theft.
In my experience women as a whole tend to be more trusting than men.
I certainly wasn’t thinking about Where the behavior originates…and as you state it probably is a learned one not biological…I don’t know.
The panty line joke probably was in poor taste I’ll admit but aside from the joke the underlying behavior still stands…they won’t put anything in their pockets, front or back, because it looks bad. It sounds shallow but even the smartest of the women I’ve talked to on the bus often act in the same manner. But is it any reason to let someone else carry your identity (wallet/purse) around for you???
The thing with the men seems to be being very picky about the hair and on the nights they all tend to go out to party some of them don’t carry their wallets either…they stick their ID and some cash/credit card in a front pocket. But most of them still carry the wallet and stick it in a rear pocket anyway..they don’t pass it to thier bud with the baggy jeans to hold for them. They’re not concerned with how a wallet makes the backside look.
And again is all this peculiar to the age group (18-25)?? To Gen Y in particular?? Do they “grow out of it”??
Wallet as phallic symbol??? Don’t remember ever hearing that…gives me something to go do some research on but the premise certainly sounds valid.
Hi Roland,
I really didn’t think that you were intentionally trying to come off as sexist, but I did want to point out how the comments were perceived.
Maybe it is an age thing. I’m guessing most of the people on your bus are probably living on their own for the first time, or that they really haven’t had much experience in the “real world.” Hopefully they will grow out of handing their wallets over to someone else.
Given the fact that most identity theft crime is committed against someone the perpetrator knows, what does this say for all of us, regardless of our gender?
Sad, isn’t it, that one can’t even trust a spouse? I hate to sound like a conservative, but what has become of our values?
Or when the crime happens SO close to home is something more complex going on?…
For example, in the case of Kathy Griffin’s husband, I’d love to know more about the ‘power dynamics’ in that relationship, particularly when it came to how they handled finances. Did they marry before Kathy became famous? Did hubby make his own income or was he ‘financially’ dependent on Kathy? Was she seen by him as ‘controlling’ of that income and, did she use that control over him in the relationship? Hmmm….not that I am saying stealing is ever right, but, sometimes we have to look beneath the surface to get the whole story…
Also – I don’t think it is ‘sexist’ to say that women are more easily taken advantage of, mostly because most of us are socialized to trust and just generally, BE NICE…
We don’t live in a patriarchal society, we live in an aggressive, sometimes violent, individualistic society, still too much based on ‘survival of the fittest’. I don’t know where the balance is – some need to ‘survive’ does make us stronger…